Money For Nothing



prewasher goldie (2)

I called one of those coupon maid services in my neighborhood to see if they could come and help me get the house in order so that I can put it on the market.  The “nice lady” who answered the phone rattled off a long list of things their team would do … from cleaning the blades on our ceiling fans to washing down the outsides of all our appliances.  It was a comprehensive list and the coupon price was right so I scheduled a cleaning for the following week.  In my “working days” I hired several maid services, sometimes for regular cleanings, occasionally for the odd one night stand.  I know how these people work.  Like the blow and go lawn care teams, they really don’t do any major efforting, they bust some dust and merrily maid go on their way.  So I had no expectations that my house would be Home and Garden photo ready after the maid-4-u had waved their magic wands.

Of course, the egoic mind likes to run a story about hiring a team to come help out.  Being disabled, means I’m home all day long .. ostensibly with nothing to do.  So why can’t I keep on top of the mopping, toilets, counters and those ceiling fan blades?  But my reality as it is, allows me to hang a load of laundry every now and zen.  Keep the dinner dishes and pots from piling up on the kitchen counter (most of the time!) and …… well … actually that’s about all I can manage.  I do wish I could do more.  I still see images of June Cleaver in my head as I count my short comings.  But even the Brady Bunch had a maid, I remind myself.  And I try and be thankful for the days that I feel well enough to scrub the floor with a bucket and sponge — because that is decidedly easier for me than being upright.

But I’ve wandered from my rant … when the team did show up, almost 20 minutes late this morning, there was one gentleman, two ladies … and two cars.  The service claims that they bring all of their own cleaning supplies … but admittedly I was surprised when they carried only a small bucket and hand held dust buster.  That should have been my first red flag, if I ignored their tardiness.  The young man asked that I show them around the house, which I did, breathless as I was from walking/talking and using my cane.  I told them, I understood their limitations and that whatever they could DO for us, would be a help.  At least three times I said, “just do what you can do”.

I showed them the master bedroom and bath … admittedly, this is where I spend 96% of my day and we do do our best to keep it presentable … but when I went off to show them the other two bedrooms the team seemed to get lost in my bathroom and I had to go back and fetch them.  At which time the man said to me … “I’m sorry, we have to cancel your cleaning.  There isn’t anything we can do here.”

So I asked my boyfriend to please show them out.  And I let them know that I would be leaving a review on our local business sites.

“They money for nothing company, babe.” my boyfriend said after he shut the door and watched them get into their two cars and drive off.  “They want to get paid for waving their hand around a bit.  They don’t actually want to do any work.”   And he’s right of course.  Its the fast food industry of house cleaning.  You can’t “get it your way”, they don’t “think outside the bun”, and while you look around asking yourself “where’s the beef” they “run for the border”.

Its like washing your dishes before you put them in the dishwasher.  You can’t be Maid in America, unless you first hire mr. clean, the tidy bowl manPopin Fresh and Aunt Jemima.  At times I become dismayed by what we let pass in our high-tech lives.  How we cut corners to cut costs.  We don’t even want to know which foods we eat are genetically modified.  We still don’t care about the carcinogens used as preservatives.  And the power of the glossy advertisement makes us think our air ducts can be cleaned and our lives carefree.

Its hard to teach the value of a dollar to my children or the pride in having done a good days work, when I am no longer able to work, bring home a paycheck and carry them on my health insurance.  Broke has a myriad of meanings and I’m sure the metaphoric maid simple miasma this morning was just another thread in the fabric of our distressed genes.  I realize of course, had there been a laugh track accompanying this weeks episode of Redneck Reality, that it all would be more palatable.  And that fact that my dysFUNctional family WILL provide THAT over the next several days in a variety of stand up schticks and callbacks about this murphy’s law moment in our lives is the silver lining in the dust mop.

One thought on “Money For Nothing

  1. I think this is totally bizarre. I don’t believe people want to work for money. We used to understand that work was involved to get payment. Now the people today want to get hand outs for little, if any work.

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