The Stealth of Stealing
My Dad tells a story about an old greasy spoon that he use to go to when he was a young man. It was one of those places where the cook was behind a half pane open window and you could almost taste the steam coming up from the grill.
When a new customer came in and ordered just one burger, the guy would go to the back and place the burger on twice so you could hear the double sizzle. Then he’d call back “You said you wanted TWO right?” Nine times outta ten the customer would feel bad or flustered and say, “Yeah, sure. Okay.”
Some people know what to do to milk the ego mind and they take advantage of our soft spots. Seems harmless enough when its a five and dime burger, but this stealth stealing can happen with much larger fish n chips and does so with such speed and shrewd maneuvers that any of us can become the catch of the day.
Not to air my dirty laundry online, but my washing machine broke this week. I bought this whirlpool duet last January on craigslist at a moments notice for various and sudsy reasons. Seemed like a nice enough bloke. He ran a business that fixed machines and he did come right back to my house to replace the controller board the next day when the washer gave an F11 error. After much research and hindsight I realize now that the F11 error is a minor display malfunction. The 11 is actually connected at the bottom and is suppose to be a U. I’ll leave that one sit with you a while before you roll your eyes at my high-tech attempt at sarcasm.
However when the dryer failed to start (which I didn’t realize until some weeks later because I dry my clothes on the line and promised my boyfriend I wouldn’t actually HOOK UP the gas line until he came to help me with it. — Karma? I don’t think that would be a good idea.) when I called the nice man at the refurbished store, I realized his cell phone was disconnected and there was no site or sign of his business anywhere to be found. And then of course as we researched more about this model duet, we realized there were a plethera of unsatisfied owners who were very familiar with the FU errors on these units.
So I guess I should be grateful that the washer lasted a good five months eh? We did our due diligence. I sat and pouted at the load of wet sheets that were beginning to mildew in the machine and my boyfriend researched repair codes and controller boards online. It was one of those longs days, when pain hovers like a puppy at your feet (shoulders, neck, back) and the second hand mysteriously moves slower as time drags on and what was left of your energy reserve has long ago drained away.
Somewhere in the haze of silence I suggested that we call for a free estimate and then we could make an “informed” decision as to fix or replace the unit. So I thumbed through the electronic local yellow pages to find someone in my area who would come look at the washer. I phoned the first place I saw with the big letters FREE ESTIMATE in their online add. The lady who answered the call on a Sunday was perky and spoke very fast. Then again, the second hand was still moving like molasses in a meat locker and my brain was having a hard time trying to ketchup to her enthusiasm. Within a minute she had gleefully scheduled her top repair team to come to my house — on a Sunday no less! Then right before she was ready to hang up she says, the team will be there between 3 and 6 p.m. for your free estimate if you decide to have the repair work done. If you don’t have the repairs done with us it will only cost you $49.95.
I could hear that second sizzle of the burger on the grill as my head spun for a moment and I heard myself say .. Okay, just as she hung up the phone.
We knew we weren’t going to replace the controller board, because it cost $200 online just for the part. If I didn’t know what the FU error code meant before, I certainly understood now.
In as short as I can make what is now a long shaggy dog story, the estimate came in a day late and $400. My boyfriend insisted we not waste any more money on a craigslist appliance — because he knows how my brain works and no longer trusts me with heavy machinery. And our $500 top loading new washing machine will be delivered from Lowes tomorrow.
Its hard to always stand up for ourselves and say what needs to be said in the moment. Sometimes we simply get taken off guard, or we feel we can’t handle the stress of confrontation and willingly or not we end up paying the price when we should have stood up and shouted back at least a metaphoric FU instead of being taken to the cleaners or losing the shirt off our backs.
